Tomorrow is the day. Mountains here I come!

Much love,

i am not

B Collision and the Mountains?

"If I can be of any help, you're in more trouble than I thought."

That quote makes me laugh. Probably because it is so true. Ahhh...well it's been a few days and I figured that all (one) of you that read this blog are probably getting tired of looking at the previous picture and quote of the day. Actually, the real reason I'm posting is because I really don't want to work on paperwork. So sad...I'm almost finished though. It'll probably be another late night for me. Too much caffeine today. Not enough sleep last night. I'm starting to get a little worried about driving home on Friday. Not really but it's been a long time since I've spent that much time in the car at once. And I haven't had a lot of sleep this week. Reminds me of college. Except not because I'm not in class, work all day long, and don't live on campus. Okay so I've just been staying up late like I did in college because for whatever reason (I have a pretty good idea what it is) I can't get to bed early. Needless to say, spending seven hours in the car on Friday doesn't really sound like my idea of fun. Although, my iPod is ready to go with some good tunes.

Speaking of...I made a playlist for the drive...seven hours without repeating a song. I'll be listening to a lot of Crowder. Does anybody have his newest, "B Collision"? I downloaded it off iTunes. I love it. I was at the concert where the live recordings were recorded. If you look it says recorded in Kansas...Yep that was at MNU. It was a blast. I was actually supposed to see clients that night but one cancelled so I cancelled on the other one and went to the concert. I didn't know it but they were sold out, but Klay got me a ticket. One of the last. I sat with Karen and Mimi from Maranatha. I've never had so much fun at a concert. Seriously...SCC may be my all time favorite (CT ranks up there pretty high too) but Crowder is definitely the most fun concert I've ever been too. Who knew worship could be so much fun? (I'm being sarcastic but serious.)

Well...I've put off long enough. I really must get back to the good ole paperwork. It's almost finished. Yippee! Mountains here I come...in three days!

Much love,
i am not

the spell check on this thing didn't recognize the word "blog." that's kind of crazy.

...and a diet cherry coke.

Quote of the day: "A leading authority is anyone who has guessed right more than once." If Reality Comes Knocking...I'm not answering the door.

Well...I'm buried up to my elbows in paperwork. That's okay. It'll all be over soon. I have been horribly unorganzied in the past few months (I wonder where I get it?). My house pretty much looks like a tornado hit it. Actually, it looks better than it did this morning. It was really bad then. The plan is to clean it before I go to Elkhart on Friday. We'll see if it actually happens.

I guess I don't have much to say today. Not that it really matters anyway. Maybe tomorrow I'll write something actually worth reading. Well...I'd better get back to my paperwork and diet cherry coke.

Oh...one week to go!

Much love,
i am not

The countdown continues

Quote of the day: " The more the big picture comes into view, the more we realize just how small a piece of the whole canvas we really see." Matt Redman "Facedown"

8 days until mountains! I'm ready. Not that there's anybody that really cares...mostly because I seriously doubt anyone actually reads this. Oh well...it's good therapy for me (haha). Maybe someday I'll post something more substantial. That day is not today however. I'm off to bed.

Much love,

i am not

It is finished...part one.

Quote of the day: "Impossible is only an opinion." unknown (at least to me)

Well...it has happened. Today's the day that I've been working toward for the last 15 months. The clinical part of my internship is finished. Wow. That's crazy. It's been a very long road. But one that I don't think I would trade for anything...even all the sleep I lost because of it. Just kidding....no not really.

I still have paperwork to finish and need meet with my supervisors and Cayla Bland, my clinical director. So...it should all be official next Tuesday. Oh and prayer request...Wednesday morning Barbara and Janet are meeting with someone (I don't remember who). If all goes well I may have a job (at least part-time) in October.

12 days to mountains.

Much love,
i am not

Heat, Printers, and such

Quote of the day: "i am not all-knowing." L.G.

Well, it's hot outside. Currently it's 10pm and 86 degrees with a humidity of 77%. I was just outside talking to my dad on the telephone (because it doesn't work in the house, stupid technology) and it was nasty. I can't wait until the cool, dry mountains. Less than two weeks now.

My printer broke tonight. I was trying to print some things and it would print one line of nonsense page after page. It only got through two pages of that and I tried unplugging it and canceling all print jobs...just about anything I could think of. Then comes the paper jam of the century. There's no way I'm getting that one out. I've had the printer for five years. I think it might be time for a new one. So it looks like "Matt," as my former roommate so affectionally called the printer (short story that I don't feel like telling) will be put to rest. Paperwork now on hold. On the positive side, I've got the ton of it somewhat organized though. It's only a matter of time.

I suspect that at this time tomorrow night I will be writing saying that I have completed the clinical portion of my internship. It won't be official until I meet with Cayla (yes...that's like mine only spelled differently) sometime next week. Loads to do before then. The end is in sight. The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned back on and is beginning to glow brighter. Almost there...

Much love,

i am not

Another day...

Quote of the day: "i am not holding it all together." L.G.

Today was supposed to be the day, but in the end it wasn't. Now, I only have half-an-hour left. So that just means that Monday will be the day. Oh well...as much paperwork as I've got left to finish it's not really a big deal. Actually, it shouldn't take me all that long to finish it out. Probably a good part of next week. I got a lot of it organized so I just need to type it up, print it out, and put it in the files. Not a problem. I hope.

One thing I've learned this year...expect the road to curve suddenly and very sharply, especially when you least expect it. I've certainly learned to fly by the seat of my pants when need be. I feel like I've learned a lot and grown so much. I promise...very soon I will quit talking about how many hours I have left and will get on to more interesting stuff. Okay...I can't promise my posts will become more interesting but they won't be so much about my clinical hours. Have I mentioned today that I go to the mountains in two weeks? I can't wait.

Well, I'd best be off. I'm singing in the worship team at church in the morning and have to be there by 8:30. That means that I should probably get to bed. Hope everyone has a blessed Sabbath.

Much love,
i am not

15 Days and counting!

Quote of the day: " i am not the Savior." LG

I believe the count is now down to 15 days. Have you caught on to the mountain themed photos? Yep...everyday. Have I mentioned that I'm ready to go to the mountains yet? Well...I am.

That's pretty much all for today. Hope everyone is having a happy Friday!

Much love,
i am not

Wonderful Maker

Quote of the day: "i am not the maker." LG.

What a fitting quote for the picture. It's of Wheeler Peak in New Mexico (where i will be in 17 days!). i love the beauty of the mountains. The peace. Majesty. Glory. Everything. And i am so thankful that i am not the maker. Because even in my wildest dreams i could not have dreamed up something as amazing as what is in that picture. Chris Tomlin sings a couple of songs that fit so well.

"Mountain maker...You made it all; said 'Let there be.' And there was all that we see. The sound of Your voice; the work of Your hands. You do all things well!"

and

"What a wondeful maker! What a wonderful Savior. How majestic Your whispers. How humble Your love. With a strength like no other. And the heart of a Father. How majestic Your whispers.
What a Wondeful God!"

i couldn't have said it better myself! Only 17 more days. i can't wait!

Much love,

i am not

Oh the...

Quote of the day: "i am not in charge of anything." LG

Mountains in 18 days!!!! I'm so ready. I'd go tomorrow if I could. Actually, I think I'd live there if I could. Maybe I will. I think I might start looking for a counseling job somewhere in the mountains. That sounds like a good idea. Anybody out there know of any?




This is a picture of Duncan and me taken with my camera phone. Not the best quality. He's pretty cute and funny as all get out. Here he's showing off his basketball. Actually he just likes to show off. He's a good boy though. When he wants to be.

Well...I don't have anything else to say. It's raining again. That's a very good thing. It has been so dry the last few months. Well, I guess I'll go. I've gotten pretty good at not doing the things that I need to. That's pretty much what I'm doing now. Okay, going for real this time.

Much love,

i am not

Because I Can

Quote of the day: "i am not the head of anything..." LG

Well...basically this post is useless. Mainly I just wanted to add a picture because I like it when people put pictures on their blog. I rambled on and on in my last post and probably will in this one as well. That's okay because I seriously doubt anyone reads it anyway. So...I went to Leavenworth this morning. Picked up four hours. Only eight to go!!!! Interesting day. Went and saw X-Men this afternoon. It was pretty good. No surprise. Somehow I've managed to hurt my wrist. I've been taking pain relievers (i.e. Tylenol, Advil, Alieve)...so far nothing's working. I can't tell if I've pulled a ligament or something (I heard and felt something pop the other day. It's been bothering me ever since.) or if I've managed to bruise it. Hopefully it will go away (the pain) in a few days. If not I'll probably have to go to the doctor. I can barely pick anything up. Even typing is making it hurt. Not good.

Well...to the powers that be and anyone reading this, I must be off. I think I can hear my bed calling my name. Or maybe it's just the voices in my head. Either way, I'm out. Have a blessed Sabbath. Much love,

i am not

Almost...

quote of the day: " i am not running anything..."

Well...I'm down to about 12 client hours to go. Still a ton of paperwork to do and no motivation to get it done. Not good. As excited as I am about being finished with my internship, I'm really not so excited about leaving my clients. Today I met with one who has been hard to work with at times. I can't really discuss it and certainly won't go into details, but it's not going to be easy to "leave" the kid. The new intern was supposed to be meeting with us today; she's supposed to have been meeting with us for the last month but has only seen the kid once. My supervisors were both out of town so it was just going to be the two of us and the clients. Not a big deal. I've dealt with many on my own before. Yeah so she was late and I called her and she said that our supervisor had told her that they weren't coming today. I can't imagine how that could be true b/c the said supervisor and I had talked about the session for today just yesterday. She (the new intern) was then going to meet me for our next appointment. Right...didn't show for either. I was trying to process through the sessions on my way home and found myself extremely irritated. Granted, the first session wasn't a piece of cake but I've had harder sessions that didn't seem to affect me nearly as much. I think it just hit me that I'm almost finished seeing these clients....people that I now have a vested interest in. I've put a lot of time and effort into these people and the person I'm handing them off to doesn't seem to care. Thankfully my supervisors will still be there and they have a relationship with my clients.

There have been many days that I've felt that I missed the boat on this counseling thing. There is so much emphasis on our "calling" as Christians. I've been thinking about that a lot. At one point I may have argued with this statement until I was blue in the face...or just ignored it as blasphemy. I don't necessarily feel like God "called" me to be a counselor. He certainly hasn't let me quit, but I can't say at this point that I feel like it is the "calling" of my life. Now there are those who will say that that just means that I haven't truely found God

Well...CD updated so I figured I'd better too. If you don't know who that is, that's okay. You don't need to. :) KRR, don't read too much into that.

So...I went back to work today. Finally! Well...only sort of. Sid didn't have to work today but he was out of the house all morning. I was supposed to see a couple of clients this afternoon so Sid came home around lunch time and I left. My clients weren't where they were supposed to be so no hours for me. I'm going to Leavenworth this evening though so that'll be 2.5. I can't wait. Actually I really can't wait until the end of the month when I go to the mountains. That's the picture. Of the mountains. Only 26 days to go...
I'm so excited.

I was going to write something meaningful, but don't really feel like it now. I've been talking to my mom about somethings that have gone on at home. Actually we've been talking about handling some of the things at home. I'm really glad I'm not there. It's not been easy. I can sit here and dole out all kinds of advice but actually putting it into practice is the hard part. I get that. So...I'm thinking about writing a communications/relationship group/seminar. We'll see if it actually happens. Maybe I'll just write a book. I don't know if I could sell it though. I don't think there are too many people that read this. Not that I blame them. I really haven't said anything important. Maybe next time...

much love,
i am not (a.k.a. kayla)

Well...now I've got a blogger too. I'm already on xanga and myspace. Everytime I turn around another friend has joined some kind of blogging/web community. And...because I love all of my friends and miss them (the ones that don't live near me) and would like to keep up with them, I too join all these different web communities. It's been a while since I've updated my xanga page. It seems that many from the Ashland gang have given up on xanga. I do miss keeping up with them. A few of them have joined myspace. It's actually on myspace where I keep up with my friends who live here in town. Oh...and my cousins occasionally. Now two of my pastors have joined blogger as has my best friend. So...guess what! Now I have a place on blogspot too. So...if you've made it this far with me, THANK YOU! Life is good. It will be even better in a few short weeks. I've almost completed my clinical internship. At the moment, I'm sitting on about 20 client hours to go. I still have about twice that in paperwork but it'll get done. I'm excited. At the same time, I'm a bit sad to see it end. I've enjoyed working with my supervisors, Barbara and Janet and will also miss working with clients too. Who knows when I'll be able to start back up again and where that will be. Actually, I do know who knows. Praise Jesus! He's got the whole thing figured out! Whew...I don't have to worry about it. That's a very comforting thought. Well...I hope anyone and everyone who finds their way on here has a wonderful day...week...month...year...etc. Must go...

Much love

kayla

Well...no wonder I couldn't get this user name. I already had it. That's just crazy. So...I'm just sitting here at home. My dad's watching television...he was in town meeting with clients today. It's the weekend but I have to work tomorrow. Only 20 hours to go. I'm so excited. Well...we'll see how this goes.